Friday, September 25, 2009

Day 17 and 18

Well I've hit a bit of a slump. Day 16 was another one of those days that just came and went. Not very eventful, not very LIVING in the moment.

Which led to day 17- WOW! wish I could do that one over again!

Day 17 was a rough one for me. I wasn't feeling very...

I couldn't shake the blah's away. I felt restless but unmotivated. It was as if the left side of my brain was fighting with the right. I knew I had to get up, get moving, forge forward yet I couldn't. Or better put, I didn't. I knew that I was my own worst enemy. I could feel the desire inside of me to be the BEST I could. The best ME, the best MOTHER, the best WIFE but I felt like I was wearing cement shoes while walking through quick sand. Upset with myself for not being able to just DO it. I battled myself all day. It was ugly. One of those 1 step forward 2 steps back kind of days. Thank God for the hubby. I don't know what has gotten into him lately but he has found a compassion and strength that manages to keep me from going insane on days like these. He knew exactly when I needed to be left alone, or needed to talk and exactly when I just needed him to hold me. I am very thankful for that. It is the only thing that helped me survive day 17.

Anyhow, after a great nights sleep, day 18 holds possibilities of so much more!
I woke up feeling like I left the concrete shoes behind and managed to wiggle myself free from the quicksand! I feel like I am ready to..... We are headed to San Diego this afternoon to attend a "Love and Respect" conference.
This should be interesting with the hubby's A.D.D. we'll see how much info he retains! I'm kidding! (well not about the a.d.d. ) I am excited for this workshop. It should be a great experience for both of us. You know I read somewhere that you should look at your marriage like a huge snake. If you don't feed it every day, something bad WILL happen. So were off to "feed our snake" be back Sunday!

1 comment:

Lemonade Makin' Mama said...

Oh that Love and Respect... we are taking that class... enjoy the conference, and you know what sweetie... don't beat yourself up over days when you feel rotten. We all have em! You are awesome for even doing this... while I, my lazy self, just cheer for you and do nothing. lol

Have fun!